Why things don't work out...

Nothing was working.

The swans were not exactly being cooperative. Most of them were busy snoozing, heads tucked in deep under their wings.

But that wasn’t the issue.

But even when the odd one woke up, flapped its wings and peered around in the gloom, or decided to glide in the waters to another spot, I was not able to make the images that I would have liked to. I was neither able to identify an opportunity nor was I was able to visualize what I could wait for.

My brain had frozen.

It was unbelievably cold, the temperature was around -16 deg C. Which was way way colder than anything that I had ever experienced.

I was feeling mighty uncomfortable. My hands were numb. My nose didn’t seem as if it belonged to my face. I pulled my balaclava over my nose. That resulted in my glasses fogging up.

Was that a rash that I am developing on my neck ? Is that new inner clothing causing an itch ?

Groan.

Good days in the field are when you are in the zone. You experiment new angles, new settings freely. You are making decisions intuitively. You are unhurried. You are calm. Calculating. And, rooted in the moment. At peace with the world around you. You move from one attempt to another, not really fussed about how well that attempt turned out. Everything is a possibility that needs to be explored and your mind is calmly ticking away, thinking, exploring, moving on. Getting it right is not as important as trying is.

This definitely wasn’t one of those days.

I decided to walk around. Maybe something will click, I might be able to see a different perspective, a different angle.

Nope. Didn’t work.

You do get bad days in the field.

And, I am not talking about days when there is either no subject available, or no action happening, or when the weather is terrible. Those are not in your control and while its rather pointless to gripe about them, you can actually use some of these factors to see how you could use them to your benefit.

Michael Caine had a line I try to keep in mind – Use the difficulty.

Raining ? Can you try slow shutter and have some fun with those raindrops ? Snowing ? Ditto. No subjects around you ? Read a book. Take a nap. Or even better…let your mind roam.

For you to use the difficulty, your mind needs to be alert.

The real bad days are when your mind refuses to play ball. When it freezes up and stays sullen, unresponsive to what is happening around you. Sometimes it happens when there is just so much action happening around you, that you get a little overwhelmed. You are not sure of what to focus on, you are worried about missing opportunities despite it raining down all around you. Sometimes, you put the pressure of your own expectations on yourself. You want to maximise being at the place. That plays on your mind, the anxiety ensuring that you miss opportunities even when they are staring in your face.

Or it would be the sort of freeze that was happening to me here.

I was at Lake Kussharo in Hokkaido.

It is the largest caldera lake in Japan which usually freezes over when winter is at its peak. Along the shoreline though, there are hot springs that keep the water relatively warmer. Lake Kussharo is where the whooper swans flock to during the coldest phases every winter.

Its such an incredibly picturesque place !

And a pretty subject to suit the place !

It’s a beautiful place to create images.

The steam coming from the sides where the hot springs exist often lend a very mystic feel to the scene. And, if the sun happens to be strong for a few minutes, the sun light plays a golden dance with the rising steam and it looks simply divine. There are other moments where the place could be foggy or snow would gently fall. The place is forever gently suggesting multiple opportunities for creating images. Foggy silhouettes of snows, their long necks arching gracefully as they search for food. Or just few indistinct heads standing out through the swirling steam. Or sometimes a sharper image of just a swan’s head coming through, enveloped in a dense fog, looking absolutely ethereal.

But, for me none of these images were coming through well. I was missing opportunities by the dozen and the few that I identified, I wasn’t doing a great job with my compositions. It was not the case of one bad morning or one day. I was badly stuck on most occasions.

I tried to figure out what was happening. The days leading to Lake Kussharo have been pretty decent. I might have had the odd off day, but I was creating fairly satisfying images. I definitely hadn’t arrived at Lake Kussharo under any pressure of having had a below average trip and with the weight of making up.

Yes, I might have always told myself that this is the place where I would be the most challenged to create images, but I was also reasonably confident that I will be able to do it. And despite being unable to create anything that I was feeling good about, I was not getting frustrated. I was calm. Which was good.

Yet, I was not in the  ‘flow’ state. Far from it.

It could have been the cold.

While I love being out in the snow, I have this huge need to be warm and had planned my clothing for this trip with the utmost care. I had the right layers of thermals. I had also got a pair of ski pants which were really warm and which also allowed me to lie down on the snow without any fear of any dampness getting through. I might not have been the most agile rabbit around with all that bulk on me, but it wasn’t too bothersome.

The hands were another issue though. I had bought a far better pair of gloves but it didn’t seem to be enough. The hand warmers that I had, both the conventional and the battery operated ones, didn’t make any impact.

The exposed parts of the face also felt uncomfortable. The balaclava helped but it did feel uncomfortable when I covered my mouth and nose.

Yeah, the cold was definitely a big factor. I found myself thinking differently, and exploring different perspectives far more actively during the evenings when the temperature eased up considerably.

I also need to work on my mobility a little more. I found it difficult to lie  down on the snow to take images. My neck and my back screamed in protest. I also need to master taking photos off the screen instead of the eyepiece which would have been physically an easier thing to do.

I think, my mind was also occupied with all the small and not so small physical discomforts instead of being focused on what was around me. I was forcing myself away from all the physical difficulties and to look for opportunities. Opportunities, I think, get identified more easily when you are waiting for them, not when you are looking for them.

Opportunities might not have been as frequent as I would have liked but they were there and I have missed them. I have seen some of the images that my friends have created. Brilliant ones.

I will need to figure this out. And I will. There are a few trips next year where the temperature will be lower than what we encountered in Hokkaido.

I can’t let my brain freeze in those places, can I ?

The whooper swan has such a graceful neck

Its such a long and flexible neck

Swirling mist and steam, calm swans...you need to wait for all of them to be in the right place and pose for a striking image

Occasionally, it happens and you are also ready for it

Sometimes its gets a lot denser and you wait for a head to emerge...sometimes hazy

...sometimes a little sharper

Or wait for a character to simply walk into the scene

You try a different perspective

And then you try to make the setting sun a little more dramatic

You aim for some seriously minimalistic frames

And a few not so "seriously" minimalistic ones !

Will a slow shutter approach work as a swan flaps its wings trying to summon up some warmth ?

Or a very different and dramatic angle ?

Most of the time the swans were doing this...resting. Patience and an uncluttered mind are critical

Cheers !

Ashok